Serious brain drain
30 March 2010(Reprinted from The Edge – Options pullout, 29 March 2010 issue)
Dear Kam,
I hear rumblings that the brain drain is quite serious.
No brain
I think I’ve already mentioned this story but it’s worth repeating. Before the last elections, a BN candidate was asked about the brain drain issue and he essentially said it wasn’t a problem because the best ones had already left. The candidate lost in the election, by the way.
Dear Kam,
Why do we have ratings AND censorship for fi lms? Might as well not have the rating system at all.
X-Rated
I’ve never understood this either. I haven’t been to the cinema for a while but I seem to remember that the movies are rated for all sorts of naughty things. As with so many things in this country, I simply ignore it (there are so many things one has to ignore). The various ratings are supposed to warn us that the movie contains violence, sex, religious or political elements. Basically, they warn us that we’re about to watch a movie. And then they censor the movie anyway, and take out all the kissing, most of the swearing and a few extra words, some of the violence and most of the plot. Fortunately for us, most movies don’t have much plot to begin with, so we’re not missing much. But if characters say anything crucially important while they’re kissing, then you’ll have to buy the DVD.
I think what they’re trying to tell us is not that the movie has any sex or violence, but that it had those things before they censored it. Possibly, what they’re trying to tell us is that people are in a lead-lined room, in a secure location deep underground, putting their lives on the line for us, cutting out any scenes of Tom Cruise kissing a girl, and then sending the off ending bits to Iran to be destroyed in a nuclear incinerator. We should all be worried for the moral well-being of the brave souls who daily expose themselves to such harmful sights.
Actually, I’ll be honest, I’ve grown so accustomed to having the kissing scenes deleted that now if I see any on a DVD it makes me feel really embarrassed. In Bollywood movies, the actors get dangerously close to an actual kiss and then they pull away. One day soon they will actually show a kiss. But not here.
Speaking of the movies, what is up with those subtitles? I don’t rely on the Bahasa subtitles but sometimes I look at them and they are almost always wrong. Several times I’ve seen the character say “Yes” but the subtitle says “Tidak”. And numbers are always wrong. The character might say 400,000 but the subtitle will say 40,000. Or they just kinda completely miss the point. My favourite was in a James Bond movie where the dashing and suave Bond says, “Ah, caviar, my favourite.” And the subtitle said, “Ikan bilis, sedapnya!” I like ikan bilis much more than caviar, but it’s not the same thing. But, then again, ikan perut wouldn’t be quite the same either.
It might seem funny, but actually it’s not funny at all. If you really are relying on the Bahasa subtitles then you’re being short-changed, you’re getting the shoddiest service imaginable. It’s that typically Malaysian disease where all that matters is that it’s there, and it doesn’t matter that it doesn’t actually work. It’s like having a transport system but only having half the carriages, or expensive ticket machines that don’t work. All that counts is that they’re there. You should be grateful that there are subtitles. It doesn’t matter that you’re watching a completely dif erent movie from everyone else.
Dear Kam,
If X bought 10 durians at RM150 and sold them to Y for RM400, at what price must Y now sell them before Y can afford a BMW?
X+Y=?
I’ve told you before that I’m not good at maths! But I do happen to know the mathematical equation for this question. It is: X+AP=BMW. Another solution is X+YB+NZ$=BMW2.
Dear Kam,
I’m thinking of opening a bookshop. Do you think I can make a decent income from it?
Almost a Bookworm
I love books and I spend too much money on them. I find few things are more exciting than going to a decent bookstore, browsing the shelves and choosing a book. Several times I’ve bought a book and taken it home, only to discover that I already have that book. There are two things I like to do whenever I’m visiting a new country — watch the TV commercials and visit the bookshops. It’s the best way to quickly find out a nation’s priorities and interests. Contrary to popular belief, Malaysians are avid book buyers and readers. Nowadays, in the Klang Valley at least, we have a lot of bookshops and they are full of people. Th ere are defi nitely more bookshops in KL than I’ve found in many other cities. Shanghai, for instance, is a huge city but it has surprisingly few bookshops.
But I wouldn’t recommend opening a bookshop. It’s really tough. I can only think of two independent local bookshops in KL that have succeeded against the odds: Skoob and Silverfish. Silverfish (in Bangsar) not only sells books but has also done excellent work in publishing local authors.
It’s really difficult for a bookshop to survive and it might be getting harder. Apple Computers is launching its iPad, which allows you to read and easily download books without any printing, transportation or storage costs. Personally, I don’t think I’ll ever read books on a computer. Nothing beats browsing, choosing and then reading a book.
If you don’t read much, then you should. There is absolutely no downside to reading. Even reading a bad book will excite parts of the brain that nothing else can. So get reading! Or you could watch Megamovers. Again.
Dear Kam,
I just read that China is producing tens of millions of scientists every year? Where will that leave Malaysia?
Brain-freezed
I know they’ve got a big population but surely even China can’t produce “tens of millions” of scientists every year. I’m sure it’s a lot but it can’t be that many. Can it? So they’ve got millions of scientists, but I don’t think we need to be overly worried. If they start producing tens of millions of Pan-Asian, American-accented VJs, then it’s time to start worrying.
Reprinted with the kind permission of
