Kam Raslan’s Talking Edge

(Reprinted from The Edge – Options pullout, 29 February 2016 issue)

Dear Kam,
Is it my imagination or did somebody say that we should allow mat rempits to race on the streets of KL? I mean, what?!
Mad Max

I once read several issues of a very old English language newspaper from the 1890s called the Perak Pioneer. The newspaper’s readers (presumably all British) sent in letters in which they worried about falling commodity prices and the terrible currency exchange rate, and complained endlessly about the potholes in the road. Something must be done, they demanded. And each week, there were letters complaining about the boys (I’m almost certain it said specifically Malay boys) who rode their bicycles dangerously fast down a particular hill. These (I think) Malay boys were causing mayhem among road users (rickshaws, bullock carts and one motorcar). Something must be done! Over 100 years later and now everything is completely different. For a start we have Independence, which somebody once told me was won from the Americans by Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad. It is interesting to note that this man would be old enough to remember and even fought in this remarkable war of national liberation, and yet not. According to him, it all happened in “those days”. “Last time”, to be precise.

Malaysia and Greece have the highest number of motorcycles per person in the world. We have approximately one motorcycle for every five people, although during rush hour it feels like it must be the other way around. The import tax on cars is ridiculously high (remind me again why we’re so lucky to have Proton?) but even without that, motorbikes would still be much cheaper. I grumble with envy when motorcyclists can buy a full tank of petrol for RM5 and I have to pay RM100 for my car. Not only are low CC motorbikes a cheap and efficient way to get around, but they can reach surprisingly high speeds, especially when the rider adopts the advanced aerodynamic posture called the “Superman”. Unfortunately, our already dangerous roads are particularly bad for motorcyclists. According to the World Health Organization, Malaysia has the 18th highest per capita road mortality rate in the world (between Sudan and Namibia) and 58% of those who died were travelling on motorcycles.

So what better way to celebrate the motorcycle than to give exclusive use of the roads of KL to the heroes of illegal motorcycle racing, the legendary mat rempits. After all, there are a lot of them and they make an important voting demographic. I’ve seen, or rather heard several of them rev their commitment to democracy at many political rallies. Coincidentally, opposition rallies.

If it’s possible to draw a connecting line between the letters in the old Perak Pioneer and today’s illegal bike racing, then we might imagine that young men (and Malay young men in particular) are drawn to travelling at high speed and with whatever vehicles they can afford. There is a valid argument to be made that if they’re going to do it anyway, you might as well let them do it under supervision. But why suddenly choose to reward this activity and not some other? But if the task was to produce a story to distract us from, er, other stories, then it must win this week’s prize.

Meanwhile, Malaysians keep dying on our roads at alarmingly high rates. Each day brings a new and everlasting family tragedy. I’m tempted to demand that something must be done. But I know that nothing will be.

Dear Kam,
I was driving on the highway the other day. It’s not safe.
Jittery

Wherever I go in the world, I think I notice that traffic moves at different but specific speeds. On average, Malaysians drive much slower than, say, the British. I’m used to driving in Malaysia and when I drive on a British motorway, I feel immense pressure to drive much faster than I am comfortable with. Recently, I was driving on a British motorway with a spare tyre so I had to drive at 50kph. Other drivers on the three-lane motorway were beeping me to get out of the way, and I was in the slow lane. Where was I supposed to go? In Britain, all old cars have to gain a certificate of fitness called an MOT, so, all cars have basically similar capabilities.

In Shanghai, the city traffic moves at an almost set slow speed. Cars, motorbikes, bicycles and pedestrians all move at a steady speed without deviating from their line. This might be partly because bicycles and motorbikes (which are electric and therefore silent) will also go on the pavements, so, if everybody can instinctively anticipate what everyone else will do then things are much safer. When I was in Shanghai I kept being hit by bikes when I tried to get out of their way until I learnt that I just had to keep walking at a steady pace without making any sudden changes in speed or direction and trust that they would avoid me.

I think Malaysian highways are dangerous because we have three different speeds on only two lanes. We have cars that can travel very fast, often designed for the unlimited speed limits of Germany’s autobahns. And then we have very old trucks that probably survived ambushes during the Emergency and which can only travel really slowly, and then we also have slightly newer trucks that still travel slowly but slightly faster than the really old ones and therefore attempt to overtake at the same speed as a snail with bad asthma. Even if you drive at the speed limit (which I always do, officer) you drive up to slow vehicles very suddenly, so you have to change lanes when cars are zipping past very fast. Changing lanes on a Malaysian highway is like leaving the 1950s and entering the 21st Century. I guess eventually, the old trucks will be exchanged for newer trucks and all will travel at roughly the same speed.

But if only somebody could invent some other mode of transport so we didn’t have to use the roads at all. We could call it a “train” and it could travel at “high speed”. You know, faster than an elephant. What am I saying? It’s only 2016 and such things only exist in the realms of science fiction.

Reprinted with the kind permission of