Kam Raslan’s Talking Edge

(Reprinted from The Edge – Options pullout, 9 June 2014 issue)

Dear Kam,
The World Cup is about to happen in Brazil and I am excited. Brazil is the centre of the football world and it’s the right place to hold the World Cup. But Qatar in 2022? What’s that about?
Ball Talk

There are plenty of Brazilians who do not want the World Cup to be held in their country. There are ongoing demonstrations because many believe the vast amounts of money involved in staging the tournament would be better spent on public transport, education, healthcare, and so on. But that’s an internal Brazilian issue. For the rest of the world, there can be no doubt about Brazil’s right to host the World Cup. Brazil has won the tournament a record five times and been runners-up twice. For the 1950 World Cup final between Brazil and Uruguay, a record-breaking 200,000 crammed into the legendary Maracana stadium. Goldman Sachs has crunched the numbers and determined that Brazil will win this World Cup. But Goldman Sachs is the same clever company that brought us all to the edge of financial extinction and apparently didn’t see it coming. I’d sooner trust a German octopus called Paul for football predictions, and with my money. Yet it’s safe to say that Brazil has a football culture. But Qatar?

Qatar is less than double the size of Singapore with less than half the population. Qatar is immensely wealthy with the tiny country having the 12th largest proven oil reserves and the 3rd largest natural gas reserves in the world, which must be why the Qatari police can drive around in Porsches and Lamborghinis. The country might be wealthy but it’s safe to say that Qatar does not have a rich football history. This could be because its tiny population has historically had other priorities and because Qatar gets very, very hot in the summer months. The temperature in Doha is predicted to be an astonishingly hot 48°C on the same day as the opening match of the 2014 World Cup. In KL today, the temperature is 30°C and I’m not tempted to run around outside for 90 minutes. If I had to run around in 48°C, then I would definitely be dead by half-time.

Yet despite its tiny population, its lack of a football culture (matches at Qatar’s top league club Al Saad have an average attendance of just 6,000) and its horrible summer heat, Qatar still managed to win the bid to host the 2022 World Cup, beating the US and Australia in the process (two countries that also don’t have too much of a football culture). They call the game “soccer” but US Major League Soccer matches do have an average attendance of nearly 19,000). Indonesia put in an initial bid but it was rejected, which I think is a shame because Indonesia would be an amazing place to have a World Cup.

When I heard that Qatar had won the bid to host the 2022 World Cup, I was deeply saddened. I have nothing against Qatar but the idea of playing football matches in roasting Arabian heat is clearly insane. It is physically dangerous for fans as well as players and it would make for awful football. Matches could be played at night when the temperature dips to a mere 34°C and perhaps it is possible to play the games in air conditioning but what’s the fun in that? I’m sure that most football fans would agree that Qatar is simply the wrong place to hold a World Cup. I was deeply saddened to hear that Qatar had won the bid, but I wasn’t surprised because international football is run by FIFA and FIFA is, in common with most entrenched organisations, er, how do I say this politely? FIFA is corrupt.

I don’t mean that in a money-corruption kind of way but it is a corrupted system because its members are protected from independent oversight (FIFA conducts its own investigations) and although a small coterie of men can vote out individual place-holders, FIFA as an organisation, almost as a political party, cannot itself be voted out. The system is constructed and essentially gerrymandered so that football’s actual constituency, the fans who buy the tickets, will never have any say in anything ever. As a football fan, it looks to me like FIFA runs football as its own concern like some political parties run their countries. This has been possible, inevitable, because they’ve learnt to believe that they will be in power forever and ever.

There are legendary stories of old-time English football managers passing each other wads of cash when they had conducted player transfers as essentially private deals. These payments were called “bungs” and now Qatar’s 2022 World Cup finds itself under threat because of allegations that bungs were paid for votes. The amounts are trifling (US$5 million) but the allegations are serious and could lead to Qatar losing the tournament. I don’t believe for one second that will happen. Qatar has already spent billions on stadiums and infrastructure projects and the only people I see complaining are the English, who are still upset about the failure of their 2018 bid. Besides, every bidding nation spent lots of money on junkets and other inducements, so nobody will want too much scrutiny. But the fact that allegations have been made and investigations are being undertaken should help remind all members of entrenched organisations that nothing lasts forever. Th ings do change and eventually the sins of the past will catch up.

Dear Kam,
Who will you be supporting in the World Cup?
Jersey Boys

For me, the World Cup will be all about pondering the enigma that is the England football team. Occasionally, they are very good but often they are really bad. Maybe I’m being a bit unfair. In statistical terms, it could be argued that England are the third best team in World Cup history. They regularly reach the quarter-finals, have been to two semi-finals and have won the competition once. That track record puts them above Spain. In all of Europe during the qualification matches for this year’s World Cup, England conceded the second fewest goals and scored the third most goals. That’s not bad, but, well, any football fan will know that statistics don’t always match up with what one sees. And any football fan will also know that at the World Cup finals, England is always beaten in a penalty shoot-out, and usually by Germany.

More statistics. In World Cup history, the teams with the most matches ending in draws are Italy (21) and then England and Germany (both 19). Drawn matches are decided by a penalty shoot-out in the knock-out stages of the World Cup. Historically, the best and worst teams in penalty shoot-outs are Germany (won 4) and England (lost 3). German players have taken 18 penalties and scored 17. England players have taken 14 and scored just 7. It is a virtual certainty that England will find itself in a penalty shoot-out and yet England’s manager Roy Hodgson has already said that his players are not practising penalties. Albert Einstein said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

Which means that I must be insane because as always, I will be supporting England. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve stared at the TV in utter disbelief having just witnessed England lose at penalties yet again. Why do I put myself through the torment? I don’t really know, but by supporting England since 1990, I have learnt one thing about myself: I don’t want to support any team that always wins. It is a torment but it’s a sweet torment. And there’s always the hope that next time, it will be different. I do believe that by learning from and rectifying mistakes, it will be different the next time. It will be a miracle if England wins the 2014 World Cup. But 2018? That’s a different story.

Reprinted with the kind permission of